WOMANLESS BEAUTY PAGEANT!!

Go away, Emma, and stop teasing your brother. I only have a few hours to finish getting him ready.

But Mom, this is supposed to be a woman- less beauty contest. You’re doing such a good job on Victor; nobody will ever believe he’s not a real girl. I mean, how many of the other boys are going to get their bodies waxed, or their eyebrows sculpted, or have hair extensions put in for this? And something tells me he’s going to be the only one there wearing real surgical breast prostheses. Most of them are going to look like downs or drag queens. Victor-or should I say Victoria?-could win a real beauty pageant looking like this!

Well, no child of mine is going anywhere looking like a drag queen. Now I still have put studs in his ears and do his nails. So please, honey, leave us alone while I finish making your brother look like the perfect pageant princess.

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